Still n0t winning

I kn0w I'm n0t understanding the pattern 0f y0ur behavi0r and what the tricks, why's, causes, reas0ns 0f y0u d0ing 0ne thing fr0m an0ther. Maybe u really have a seri0us sexual attracti0n t0 me and c0uld even have a sex addicti0n 0ff 0f me. I'm still scarred f0r life and tired 0f the way I will always feel like I will be s0bbing 0n the inside. Time hasn't healed the pain 0r my scars. Y0u just d0n't kn0w the depth 0f y0ur betrayal. Y0u d0n't understand h0w wr0ng 0f a man y0u are f0r me. Y0u were s0 judgmental, quick t0 be judgmental, and p00r in judgment. Y0u were never a fact finder ab0ut anything. Y0u were always g0ing t0 betray me in the w0rst way and expect me t0 be subjected at y0ur's 0r whatever fucktard's mercy. Y0u r0yally made and underd0g 0ut 0f me and went the distance in being the m0st hateful, sadistic, c0ntr0lling, and t0rmenting m0st sick and hateful man I've ever seen in my life. 0f c0urse y0u will never be the vulnerable victim that I will. I will never get 0ver that y0u made me pretty much anyb0dy and everyb0dy's l0ser with y0ur prejudiced, shall0w, vain, and piggish desperate judgment. I have never been s0 vi0lently disheartened and upset in all my life. Pe0ple will always want t0 c0mpete with y0ur sadism and treat y0ur sadism like it is the m0st n0rmal thing t0 d0 0r be. While y0u admit y0u are a p00r and pathetic influencer y0u have influenced a l0t 0f retards in y0ur sadistic and c0ntr0lling directi0n. They're t00 dense t0 see their barbaric and desperate t0tallitarianism and they think it is n0rmal and 0k t0 be like that. I kn0w I'm s0bbing 0n the inside and every time u c0me ar0und 0r every time y0u stay ar0und I kn0w there will always be s0mething else f0r me t0 run int0 t0 remind me 0f y0ur t0tallitariam mayhem and damages and that I will always have s0mething t0 s0b ab0ut. I will never kn0w why y0u lived t0 hate 0n me and be sadistic at such extreme levels like that. Y0u w0uld think that if y0u hated 0n me s0 much, y0u w0uld have been 0ver me by n0w, but y0u're n0t 0ver me and y0u are the 0ne wh0 is taking advantage 0f me.